Wednesday, 30 May 2012

Forgotten God

Sometimes I feel completely useless. Yesterday was my first day back at teaching, after being off ill for two weeks. I had started to ask God the question, ‘Why did you bring me here but have the girls lose vital weeks of teaching?’ I’ve come all the way over here from the UK and have been constantly delayed and had to miss lessons due to things out of my control. My tooth broke, and I was in Kampala for a week; I was ill for two weeks; I’ve been besieged by migraines and had to take random days off in the middle of the week… I had begun to convince myself the girls were learning nothing because I was never around.

I’ve been reading Francis Chan’s book ‘Forgotten God’, about the Holy Spirit, to prepare for a session on the third member of the Godhead that nobody really feels they know much about. On reading it, I realised I know very little about him either! In the book, when Chan asks the question ‘When was the last time you undeniable saw the Spirit at work in or around you?’ My first response was ‘a long time ago, because I haven’t been able to do His work’. Then I actually had a think about that, and it hit me that I had experienced Him this very afternoon.

Monday, 21 May 2012

I'm a pregnant refugee

I was thinking very philosophically this morning, and I've decided my body must be feeling so bad because my heart is in the wrong place, as well. As much as I have been ill a lot recently, the things that have been really bothering me are more of a heart nature.
I was reading from The Message the other day (seriously my favourite Bible paraphrase - so readable and makes the Bible come alive if you're struggling, as I often do. Don't use it for study though) and I read from Romans 8:19-28. I would usually just link to it, but the words are so powerful I'll put them in full here:

The created world itself can hardly wait for what's coming next. Everything in creation is being more or less held back. God reins it in until both creation and all the creatures are ready and can be released at the same moment into the glorious times ahead. Meanwhile, the joyful anticipation deepens. All around us we observe a pregnant creation. The difficult times of pain throughout the world are simply birth pangs. But it's not only around us; it's within us. The Spirit of God is arousing us within. We're also feeling the birth pangs. These sterile and barren bodies of ours are yearning for full deliverance. That is why waiting does not diminish us, any more than waiting diminishes a pregnant mother. We are enlarged in the waiting. We, of course, don't see what is enlarging us. But the longer we wait, the larger we become, and the more joyful our expectancy. Meanwhile, the moment we get tired in the waiting, God's Spirit is right alongside helping us along. If we don't know how or what to pray, it doesn't matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans. He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God. That's why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good.

Sunday, 20 May 2012

Tiredness and kittens

It's been a while, I'm usually a lot better at writing here, and I'm sorry I've been out of touch. It's been a hard few weeks, and I think the reality of being here is hitting me again and I've not had the energy to be updating.

I moved house a couple of weeks ago, and I really think God for providing me with somewhere so perfect. It's a little apartment in a complex of 7, with a security guard and lovely gardens. It's exactly the kind of place I'd hoped I'd get, and the rent is really affordable. It took a while to move in and get settled (still missing a fair bit of furniture, and no mirrors in the house!) but it's so lovely. On Monday I'll be getting a couple of kittens from a friend who unexpectedly had them (her cat, not her!) and I can't help feeling that will complete the place. Aren't they cute? I'll put more pics up when they move in. Mine and the white one and the stripy one at the top. Stripy is still nameless! White one is Splash.